Though I was tempted to write an essay about why I am stressed out and all that ails me, but I thought better of it. I think I need to take more time for amusement, and so, I hereby present the story of my "Fall Break":

Right, so.

Given that we had been given a whole day (wow, a whole day! that meant all of two classes!) off, my friends and I took it upon ourselves to take advantage of our city's fine location: wedged between two much bigger, better cities (eg: New York and Washington, D.C.). So we took that fine, fine bus line known as Greyhound to our nation's capitol very, very early on Friday morning.

Realization: Nice people take Amtrak. Strange, weird, scary people take Greyhound.

Despite the fact that it was an ungodly early hour (well, 8:15, but that is freaking early, when you consider we had to get our sleepy selves to the station by 7:15 because Greyhound has a great, great policy where even if your ticket says you are leaving at a particular time, it actually has no significance whatsoever, and you really aren't gauranteed any sort of seat at all. But anyway) there was a very creepy, very weird, very curious and talkative man with far, far too many tattoos in the seat in front of me.

Early on, I made use of my sunglasses, figuring that their ability to block my eyes and thus avoid eye contact, combined with my ability to feign sleep would be enough to keep him away. But no. Oh, no. He talked anyway. A lot.

I recall comments like "If I want to give my son a tattoo, then, I'll give him one, damnit!". My friend, not realizing the powers of faked sleep, attempted to do some studying on the bus, which prompted him to ask her what it was she was reading. Psych, she told him.

"Whoa, so... you can like read minds and stuff? Weird! What am I thinking now! Tell me what am I thinking now?"

Puzzled looks in response from my friend. "I don't know what you're thinking..."

"Oh come on, you can tell me! What am I thinking??"

"I can't read minds!" she said, and then in a stroke of realization "I study PSYCH, I'm not a psychic!"

"Aw, shit. I thought you was like Dionne Warwick or somethin'....

Oh my...

--

Also falling under the "Reasons Greyhound Freaking Sucks":

After a nice day of visiting all those fabulous and free musuems and a bunch of dead president's monuments, we headed over to Georgetown for dinner at a nice Vietnamese place, which was lots of fun because they were kind enough to give us free desserts (some kind of fried bananas with ice cream -- which we didn't actually ask for, but were good all the same) 'cause they needed to make us move our seats to make room for other people. And (so fun) they set them on fire. Pyrotechnical food displays are always fun.

Anyway, by the time we left, it was about 10 pm. Ok, we figured. We'll call Greyhound and find out when the next bus leaves.

Right. So apparently, the next bus was leaving in all of 15 minutes, which we didn't exactly have, considering we were some miles from the station, and because of previously-mentioned shitty ticket policy, you really need to get there way ahead of time. And most fun of all! The next bus didn't leave until 4 am.

Four in the morning. And granted, this was our own stupid faults for not realizing sooner, and in college terms, four in the morning isn't really that early, but when you've been up since six-thirty (a time I have not woken up for since high school), walking about and experiencing your national heritige and all that crap, you're freaking tired.

On the happy side, we got to stop by GW and (I think) scare the crap out of Zara (also: shout-out to Zara's nice roommates who I met and apparently read this!). Though I feel bad we came just as she was going out and didn't call or do something nice that normal people might do ahead of time. (also note: GW really needs to beef up its security. That was just way too easy to get into.)

After our little visit, we headed over to Union Station (a much cleaner, nicer, less skechy environment than the Greyhound station down the hill) where we did the only thing we could: curled up on a bench and crashed. Or at least, I tried to. After a short while, an Amtrak cop came over and informed us we needed to sit up. Now, this is all good and well, but I was tired and alseep, and when I wake up to find a cop standing over me, looking down somewhat quizzically, I naturally get a little freaked out.

This world is a freaky place these days. I think my shouting some gutteral type sound that resembled "Huh? Wha?" (I think it was more "Huhuhgher?!?") followed by a more understandable, very loud "JESUS!" was perfectly justified. Though the cop seemed somewhat taken aback.

Anyway. It finally did reach four in the morning, and somehow (though I don't remember how exactly) I survived an excruciantingly miserable bus ride back where every moment, my leg space seemed to shrink. The black sky slowly became illuminated to a pale grey as we reached Philly, and by the time we were back at our dorms, a full 24 hours after we left, it was light again.

And I slept. And slept.

And haven't quite make it to New York yet.

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Replies: 5

Another addition to the "Reasons Caroline Will NOT Be Taking Greyhound Soon"

Posted by Caroline @ 10/20/2001 07:26 PM EST

think about it though. you can take an airplane AND a bus where they aren't supposed to go...but where the hell can you take a train?!?!

Posted by todd @ 10/22/2001 12:32 AM EST

...I can take trains to Boston. And I just paid an insane amount of money for that priveledge for Thanksgiving Break. Woo...

Posted by Caroline @ 10/22/2001 01:22 AM EST

we definitely need a new railway infrastructure in this country.

Posted by todd @ 10/22/2001 06:05 PM EST

Amtrak is just as sketchy. I took it for the first year in Syracuse to and from Penn Station. It is not something to write home about. I either got stuck next to smelly or obese people. Rock.

Posted by aimee @ 10/22/2001 07:56 PM EST