El Mundo Confusion

As those of you who know me know, I am dedicated bargain shopper. It's partly because I don't have very much money but very much enjoy nice things. But I think that even if I had unlimited amounts of money, I'd still be a thrifter.

I am one of those twisted people who gets a great thrill out of paying less -- ideally, significantly less -- than the original asking price. (Mind you, I'm not a haggler. I lack the ability to really argue at places like flea markets, even if that's what you're supposed to do. I'm all about finding the bargain, not talking someone into it.)

I also have a very good memory for things like this. You could point to any given item in my closet and I could probably give you a reasonable estimate of when I bought it and how much I paid. For example, the dress I wore to Jesse's cousin's wedding in LA? I love that dress. It's really pretty lavender-y color with beading and these cool pleats and every time I wear it (granted, I've only worn it twice; it's not the kind of thing you can take out that often) I get gushing compliments on it. It was originally $300. I know this because the original price tag was still there. I paid $27 at a little discount store on Steinway Street. It's a small, family-owned (I think?) kind of store, where clothing and linens are neatly arranged by size and (kind of quaint, I think) color. It is not the sort of place where fashionistas get into fistfights and tourists roam rampant (a la Century 21) because nobody ever knows it's there. There's also no pressure: if you're not 100% positive you love that $30 cashmere sweater, you can think about it and come back in a week and it will still be there, waiting for you to scoop it up in your arms and lovingly proclaim, "Oh cashmere sweater, what was I thinking? Of course I want you for my own!" (or, as the case may be, shrug and say "Eh, you're really not that flattering a color after all. Never mind.")

Granted, there also isn't as much new selection as I would like, and they often tend to have a bit more frump than truly cute stuff. But it's quiet and calm and I have scored a few really good items there.

I am a pretty rugged bargain shopper. In the right mood, I don't mind digging through many racks for a long time. I have often had the best luck on those 50% final clearance sections at places like Century 21, Loehmann's and TJ Maxx. Yes, a lot of it is crap, but finding a Theory jean skirt you love for $15? Worth the digging.

I used to think there was no discount store too difficult to handle. I was wrong. El Mundo Discount at Steinway and Broadway in Astoria is that store.

The store moved into an old Seaman's Furniture store last fall and did not bother to take down the Seaman's sign for many, many months. They just hung a cheap plastic banner underneath proclaiming "El Mundo Discount" and I guess that was enough for a while. That's the kind of place this is: super cheap.

I have really no retail or merchandising background, but I have to say, they do a piss-poor job of understanding that shoppers need a little space in order to see the things you are trying to sell. (OK, I guess I did spend a few weeks one summer working at Filene's Basement, but the only thing I really remember from that tenure was that one day, someone took a very big, very messy, very explosive dump. All over one of the dressing rooms.)

El Mundo Discount looks like someone took a dump all over the store, except instead of fecal matter, they expelled clothing. And shoes, and luggage, and furniture, and just about any other product you can think of, from cleaning supplies to TVs that appear to have fallen off the back of a truck.

But it is right there when I get off the subway and I'm of the mind that the best hunting grounds for bargains are the ones you can routinely check out. If you make weekly visits, you'll know what kind of things are in stock so when a new shipment comes, you won't have to waste your time looking through boring racks. You can go straight for the fresh meat. You can also keep an eye on something you like but don't like quite well enough to justify the price, so when it goes on clearance, you can snap it up right away.

I do not have the stomach to browse this store weekly. But once or twice, I've seen a selection of very fancy name shoes (Prada, YSL, etc) that were hideously ugly and still very expensive. And while I might enjoy the thrill of a fancy label, I'm not such a label whore that I'm willing to pay $200 for ugly shoes that are completely impractical. The store is mostly filled with hard-to-reach crap. Also, they don't seem to have dressing rooms (I guess that would require freeing up too much space?) and appear to have a no-returns policy, so that also makes me really hesitant to shop there.

I would have pretty much sworn off the store entirely, except a few weeks ago, I happened upon a really cute Marc Jacobs (not Marc by Marc Jacobs -- a straight up, originally $600-or-so Marc Jacobs) jacket for $30.

I didn't buy it. It was a size 2, and when it comes to super-expensive designer lines that are mostly marketed to birdlike socialites and actresses, I am probably more like a size 10. (Usually, these are referred to as "contemporary size chart" items, which really just means "at least one or two sizes smaller than you usually take, because the uber rich shun bourgeois Gap sizing.")

There were no other jackets to be found; no other Marc Jacobs pieces of any sort that I saw. But still: hope springs eternal. And so, even though I totally know better, I still find myself going back in there from time to time, in hopes of finding some kind of holy grail of bargain shopping. Someone, please stop me.